Latino men and dating

14 Jun

But the older I get, the more I find myself wanting a partner who can relate to me without needing to be taught.

I’ve become increasingly drawn to the concept of Black love, which celebrates Black couples and affirms Black pride within relationships, and I eventually want to experience this.

I replied, "Look around — I'm one of three Black guys here." There’s a clear lack of queer spaces in POC communities, and that definitely affects the ability of men of color to meet one another.

But while the absence of queer POC-centric establishments is definitely an issue, many of the other Black men I see at gay bars around Manhattan and Brooklyn are booed up with white men, too.

After graduating, I moved to New York, and though here I was able to find queer friends who are also people of color, we are still always in the minority at gay bars and clubs.

A friend of mine, who is Latino, once asked why I didn't approach Black men in bars.

Could we all be perpetuating internalized racism by consciously, or even unconsciously, excluding Black men and other men of color as romantic prospects?

And in doing that, are we only reinforcing the politics of desire that deem Black people less attractive?

About a year ago, I came across an article entitled "28 Questions for Black Men Who Only Date White Men." Each question from the article was a damning indictment of my apparently not-so-simple dating choices.Statements like "no fats or fems" or "no Blacks or Asians" litter profiles in hookup communities on Grindr, Jack'd, and similar platforms.Thankfully, marginalized queer communities have started to call out those hurtful comments as acts of discrimination rather than statements of preference.When I finally came out in college, I was at a predominantly white school.Many queer folks were closeted, and of the few who were out, most of them were white.